Should you go to a Catholic priest for marriage advice if he has never been married?

No, and I wouldn't go to a Baker for a tooth cleaning either.





Jehovah God has outlined, in the scriptures, how to have a good marriage, the role of the husand, wife and children. That is were we go for counseling and advice. Catholics don't use the Bible, they use mans teachings.Should you go to a Catholic priest for marriage advice if he has never been married?
Should you go to an oncologist who has never had cancer?





Should you to to a dentist who has never had a root canal?





Should you go to college and learn from professors who have never done anything but teach the subject matter (no practical experience)?





Should you go to a psychiatrist who has never suffered from depression?





Should you get credit counseling advice from somebody who has never owned a credit card?





The fact of the matter is, we frequently get help from professionals who have no personal experience in what we are going through. We trust them, because they have been educated about the topic.





Priests are given very thorough training on marriage because it is one of the Sacraments of the Catholic Church.





One more question:





Should you marry somebody who has never been married before? How would you ever know that they knew how to be married?





Of course, the engaged couple can know what they want in a spouse by observing other marriages, by dating, and that sort of thing. The same thing goes for priests. They observed marriages (their own parents and other relatives, friends, etc.). Most if not all of them dated prior to joining the seminary. Some were even engaged at one point. A small number of them didn't go to seminary until they were widowed. And then there is all that seminary training.





Priests are almost always more well-versed on marriage than the engaged couples who go to them for counseling.Should you go to a Catholic priest for marriage advice if he has never been married?
My first thought when I saw your question was, ';should you go to a doctor for cancer advice if he has never had cancer?';





The peculiar ';expertise'; of those ordained and set apart (i.e., sanctified, consecrated) in the vocation of priest comes through a concentration upon the things from GOD. This includes knowledge of divine law, meditation, pastoral counseling, prayer, and study of the Holy Scriptures. The effectiveness of what the priest may offer depends primarily upon the faith (i.e., the content and level of belief, hope, trust) and willingness to obey truth that is held by those to whom he ministers. Many have a level of faith that allows the priest to serve as a ';spokesperson'; and agent from GOD. For such persons, the priest prophesies (i.e., speaks the word he hears from GOD) declaring the purpose and intent of GOD. The priest then operates with an understanding that is not derived from the world (i.e., our families, our church congregations, the peer group, society-at-large). The priest has embraced a peculiar view that requires he correctly understand, ';What GOD has joined together let no man put asunder';; yet, he also acknowledges that GOD ';can and will put asunder';, for death and divorce are also tools of GOD. The ';spirit bond'; established between a husband and wife can only be totally overturned or removed through the operation of the Spirit of GOD.





There is much more to learn regarding the authority and power of GOD where men and women are used as his instruments for action upon the earth. Please, keep asking questions, and sharing your answers. Grow in grace.





Washington, DC
Sure, why not?





Being married doesn't guarantee that you'll have good advice to give. Having never been married doesn't mean a person can't understand or empathize either.





Priests were raised in families, they saw their mother's and father's interact. They are also highly educated and many are experienced in counseling. They know the Church teaching and that it their main function, to help married Catholic couples be true to God and his Church in their marriage and their families.





People with many different disorders go to psychiatrists. The psychiatrist doesn't need to have experienced all those disorders to be able to help. Similarly, many men are ob/gyn doctors and they have never had a baby or experienced being a woman, and yet many women consider them competent to treat them.





Priests are human beings. They can always relate to us on that level. They are charged with being our spiritual guides and helping us live our lives according to God's will. Their primary goal in marriage counseling would be to help a couple understand God's purpose and will for their marriage and each person's salvation.
Sure as long as they've been trained. It's like that old idea that only reformed addicts can help addicts. It's not true, you don't have to have had personal experience to counsel someone in an area. I mean is it your marriage or theirs that's the focus? Any counseling should be Biblically based anyway (if you're getting it through a church) and any priest or minister should be capable of understanding the Bible. I'd be more inclined to look at their interpersonal skills to see if I thought they could counsel me.
I would not GO TO him in his capacity as a priest, but not because he is not married.





Marriage advice should be based on God's word since he is the one that created the marriage arrangement. The fact that a marriage counselor has not been married himself does not disqualify him. What would disqualify him in my book, is a failure to point to the direction on marriage found in God's word.





It appears to me that the Catholic faith holds its traditions and teachings handed down through the centuries, and which are not firmly rooted in God's word, as having equal weight with the Bible. This is done although many such traditions and teachings appear to blatantly contradict what is contained in God's word. For this reason I would be weary about GOING TO a Catholic priest for marriage advice.





But if ANYONE were to give me advice on marriage that I see is BASED ON GOD'S WORD, it would be foolish of me to ignore it.





EDIT: I'm not married BTW - only speaking hypothetically. I hope I didn't convey that impression.
if you want to get married in the Catholic church you will have to. They are the ones who do your pre-marriage counseling.





They may not have been married themselves, but they talk to lots of couples and are trained to do couples counseling and will have plenty of good advice.





If your marriage is having trouble, I would suggest talking to your priest AND a marriage counselor.
How does it go...';Those who can't do, teach';.





Although I am an Atheist, I've heard some incredibly profound and intriguing words come from priests, even on the topic of Marriage. I was married in the Catholic Church, in fact...and the priest who performed it gave some of the best advice I've ever heard.





I don't know that all priests are like this, but...even if they haven't been through it, they've surely witnessed a great deal of it. So if its your thing, give it a whirl.





To put it in perspective, would you ask someone who has been married several times for marriage advice? I mean, they've got a quite a bit of experience, right?
Yes. The priest is an expert on the Sacrament of Marriage, and what it takes to stay happily married - even though he himself isn't married.





Too many couples think they know more about marriage simply because they are married, not the priest.


If only more of such couples knew better; knew enough to trust their priest's judgement, perhaps the divorce rate wouldn't be so high.
The qualifications for those taking the lead in the christian congregations of the first century should give us a pretty good idea of what God considered important. 1 Tim. Chapter 3, lists those qualifications. They were to be irreprehensible, and a husband of one wife, moderate in habits, sound of mind, qualified to teach, not a drunkard, reasonable and not a lover of money. It goes on to ask how a man can preside well over a congregation if he does not preside well over his own household. A married man would have much more practical information and feeling when marital issues are involved.


That's not to say that an unmarried elder would have no value as a counselor, but in general, it was preferred that the ones taking the lead have family experience.


The edict on celebacy is not a scriptural concept. As a matter of fact, in the same bible book, 1 Timothy, this time in chapter 4, verses 1 thru 5, it tells us that in later days, many will begin to pay attention to 'misleading inspired utterances, and teachings of demons.'; One of the misleading things to be taught would be that some would be forbidden to marry, and forbidding of certain foods.


So not only is celebacy NOT commanded of the ones taking the lead in the christian congregation, but the idea that it would be a command in the future was to be an indication that it was of demonic influence. Marriage is a gift from God, one never forbidden by God.
NEVER!


My husband and I had been married 8 years when his ex wife wanted him back.


She said her priest told her that she was still married to him in the eyes of the Lord.


I called him and tried to reason that as soon as my husband and I consummated our marriage the bonds he had with his first wife were severed. He told me that my husband is still her husband and that I was the adulterer because I married a divorced man.





I told him you don't know your hat from a hole in the ground and by the way the first commandment tells you to not worship idols...What's up with that?


He started screaming that it was only reminders.


I said firmly..I have pictures of my family all over the house and there are no alters or candles in front of them..I don't kneel and pray to them either. He hung up.





Priests don't know how it is between a man and a woman....and even if they say nice things it probably isn't taken from scripture.





God made marriage and he knows what works best.
Celibacy is a support to married people in their commitment to each other. The celibate reminds those who live together in marriage of their own celibate center, which they need to protect and nurture in order to live a life that does not depend simply upon the stability of emotions and affections, but also on their common love for God, who called them together. On the other hand, married people also witness to


those who have chosen the celibate life, reminding them that it is the love of God that indeed makes rich and creative human relationships possible and that the value of the celibate life becomes manifest in a generous, affectionate, and faithful care for those in need. Married people remind celibates that celibates also live in covenant and are brides and grooms. Thus celibacy and marriage need each other.





Celibates can indeed have a very good understanding of married life and married people of celibate life. Remarks such as: ';You don't know what you are talking about because you are not married (or celibate)'; can be very misleading. Precisely because marriage and celibacy are in each other's service and bound together by their common witness to God's love as the love from which all human relationships originate, celibate and married people can be of invaluable help to each other by supporting their different life-styles.





Celibacy not only witnesses to the inner sanctum to married people, but also, together with marriage, celibacy speaks of the presence of God in the world to anyone who is there to listen. In a world so congested and so entangled in conflict and pain, celibates by their dedication to God in a single life-style, and married people by their dedication to God in a life together, are signs of God's presence in this world. They both ask us in different ways to turn to God as the source of all human relationships. They both say in different ways that without giving God his rightful place in the midst of the city, we all die in the hopeless attempt to fabricate peace and love by ourselves.





The celibate speaks of the need to respect the inner sanctum at all cost; the married Christian speaks of the need to base human relationships on the intimacy with God himself. But both speak for God and his Lordship in the world, and together they give form to the Christian community and stand out as signs of hope.





Thus, in a world torn by loneliness and conflict and trying so hard to create better human relationships, celibacy is a very important witness. It encourages us to create space for him who sent his son, thus revealing to us that we can only love each other because he has loved us first.
He'll have spoken probably to more couples than most counsellors and most likely with more success.





Should you go to a high street counsellor when there's a good chance they're divorced with kids gone off the rails? I can tell you what they'll say, in fact you can save yourself the trouble and read it in a textbook right next to the stereo type they've classified you by.
Sure.





They can still give you advice. They may not be married, but they have been in relationships before...many priests have had girlfriends and even some of them have been engaged or even married.





For example, a deacon promises to only have one wife, that after his wife passes on, he will remain celibate. In these cases where the wife dies, a deacon can move into the priesthood and become a fully ordained priest. He just takes a vow of celibacy afterwords.





But they can certainly still help you. A marriage is not all about sex, there is more to it and a priest still has relationships with his family, his parish and his friends. He can still help you.





Thinking that a priest cannot because he isn't married is stupid. You therefore must also believe that unless you attempted suicide, you can't help someone contemplating suicide.





Unless you've been molested, you can't help children who have been.





Unless you've been abused, you can't help people who have been.





Unless you've been a burn victim, you can't help those who have been burned.





Unless your parents, spouse, children were murdered, you can't help those who have had their parents, spouse, children murdered.





People can certainly help others even if they haven't experienced it first hand. They can still learn and help and I know from my own experience that they have helped. When I went to my priest about my husband, I got some great advice that I don't think I would've gotten from a relationship specialist because what my husband did was acceptable in this society, but not to the Church.





You can certainly, absolutely, go to a priest for marital advice.


-------------------------





Added:





Some people have to understand what ';forbidden'; means. It means, you have NO CHOICE. You are forbidden from opening this door, you do not have a choice in the matter. If you do, then you will be punished.





A Catholic priest takes a vow of celibacy, it is his CHOICE to do so. If he wishes to marry, then he can be a Deacon. They are not forbidden to marry anyone.





Goodness gracious, please learn your words before you start accusing someone with them!
I couldn't get past ';do not call anyone on Earth ';Father'; ';forbidding to marry';





HOW could I ... conscientiously even get in the door?


Because if these two commands are right out of the gate...


Disrespected. No matter HOW GOOD the advice might be,


what would they have to say?





NO let them clean up the ';inside'; of the ';grave'; and then get on with the advice.





Matthew 23: 5 All the works they do they do to be viewed by men; for they broaden the [scripture-containing] cases that they wear as safeguards, and enlarge the fringes [of their garments]. 6 They like the most prominent place at evening meals and the front seats in the synagogues, 7 and the greetings in the marketplaces and to be called Rabbi by men. 8 But YOU, do not YOU be called Rabbi, for one is YOUR teacher, whereas all YOU are brothers. 9 Moreover, do not call anyone YOUR father on earth, for one is YOUR Father, the heavenly One. 10 Neither be called 鈥榣eaders,鈥?for YOUR Leader is one, the Christ.';





And going in direct contrast NOT to be married, an arrangement FROM GOD...











';FORBIDDING TO MARRY'; v3,4





1 Timothy 4:1-16








1 However, the inspired utterance says definitely that in later periods of time some will fall away from the faith, paying attention to misleading inspired utterances and teachings of demons, 2 by the hypocrisy of men who speak lies, marked in their conscience as with a branding iron; 3 forbidding to marry, commanding to abstain from foods which God created to be partaken of with thanksgiving by those who have faith and accurately know the truth. 4 The reason for this is that every creation of God is fine, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, 5 for it is sanctified through God鈥檚 word and prayer over [it].





6 By giving these advices to the brothers you will be a fine minister of Christ Jesus, one nourished with the words of the faith and of the fine teaching which you have followed closely. 7 But turn down the false stories which violate what is holy and which old women tell. On the other hand, be training yourself with godly devotion as your aim. 8 For bodily training is beneficial for a little; but godly devotion is beneficial for all things, as it holds promise of the life now and that which is to come. 9 Faithful and deserving of full acceptance is that statement. 10 For to this end we are working hard and exerting ourselves, because we have rested our hope on a living God, who is a Savior of all sorts of men, especially of faithful ones.
Nice one L.D.


~~~ hahahaha.......





No.


That being said....





I don't believe they are in the truth of God's word.


So, I would not trust the words that come out of their mouths.


It may sound harsh.


But, that intent is not included in my answer.





Also, they have no experience in these matters.


I have heard it said that you should


';go to one that has a measure of success.';


Be it: in service to Jehovah God,


marriage, business, etc.
No. Its like going to a person who says he is a doctor but never went to medical school. A priest doing marriage counseling is a joke. They have no idea what marriage is about. Catholic priests can't even get the Bible right much less marriage.
I was never Catholic but I would never go to someone who was never married. even someone who has never had kids to tell me how to raise them
Yes, a good priest is trained in spiritual matters. That is ultimately what married couples need.
yes





the catholic church has created some of the best and statistically accurate tests on predicting outcome of marriage
No, never take marriage or sex advice from an 80 year-old virgin.
I wish you can tell that to my family but they are strong head.


I have already told them that before like what you said.
It can be good for objective advice.
No
only if they are marrying a young boy, and then they need to talk to the police first.
lol xD