i know why i do it. I am a very self-conscious 21-year old woman, afriad that i will be alone the rest of my life (I've never dated, and never had mutual feelings for a guy... usually it's the ';i like them, but they don't me'; situation) and that i will never find that special guy. I can fight myself for hours, days even, and I still fall into it. Why? Why can't I control myself? usually i fall hardest when I feel dirty. I was able to not do it for 2 years, and I fell back into it. Even praying doesn't seem to always help. Doing it caused me to fall into a depression, and I just want to stop altogether, because I don't want to be miserable and hating myself for it anymore. As a Catholic, it goes against my values so I want to stop. I'm hurting my future husband, my friends, God, and myself. I hate having to confess it to my priest everytime i mess up. I want to stop, and I don't want people to tell me it's okay to do. for me, it's not. Any advice/techniques/suggestions, please?How to stop masturbation? seriously, I want to stop. Catholics other Christians religious people, any advice?
Go to confession- you need to start there. Masturbation is an addiction...you need to start with GRACE to overcome it.
If you are uncomfortable saying you masturbated, tell father ';Iwas impure with myself'; he'll get it. You need to tell him it has been a problem for you so he can give you good guidance.
Pray the rosary. It is a powerful tool against evil. Remember, Mary was a mortal like us, but she kept herself free from sin. She will help you.How to stop masturbation? seriously, I want to stop. Catholics other Christians religious people, any advice?
Go to a bar with a friend (girl) and find someone you like. Ask him if he wants to sleep with you (there are a lot of men in bars who would gladly accept your proposition). When you want to masturbate yourself again go to another bar and do it again. Do it alone doesn't make it less sin than doing it with another man. When you find someone stop it. It's better not to have fun alone. Finally, Religion %26amp; Spirituality section is not the right place to make these questions :-P
I understand that you do not want people to tell you ';it's OK, go ahead and masturbate.'; For you, you do not feel it is an option, your value system does not allow for such.
However, sex is a ';God'; given gift. It is not to be used lightly and there are responsibilities that go with the territory. Sex is also part of any healthy persons life. Whether it be through masturbation or intercourse with another person, it is necessary for healthy functioning.
Compare it to food. You need food but there are healthy and unhealthy eating habits. If you don't eat you will die. You may not die from lack of sex but stress is very detrimental to ones overall health and may lead to premature death, sexual release is a great stress reliever.
I strongly urge you, as others that have answered this question have, to seek a mental health counselor. Many churches offer this for their members. The advantage is counseling is done in support of your value system. You may be very surprised as I don't think the Catholic church condemns masturbation they way it has in the past. Also, you can make changes in your value system.
Good luck.
Peace.
It's questions like this that make me feel nothing but pity for such devout people. I can tell that this really is making you miserable. I'm not going to mock you, but you'll probably take it that way because I'm not going to give you the answer you're looking for.
Stop suffering over doing something natural. I'm not telling you to give up your faith, even though your faith is not my faith. Maybe god isn't answering your prayers because you AREN'T hurting god by masturbating. Before you convince yourself that you're hurting god, your future husband, and even your friends, ask yourself how this is so? The only person you're hurting right now is yourself, and not through the act of masturbation, but because of your crippling guilt over it.
Even if you want to take every rule given in the scriptures as absolute, unchanging law (the last I knew, the Catholic church approved of evaluating the Bible in a historical and metaphorical context rather than 100% literal and current), there is nothing in the Bible that condemns female masturbation. In fact, the Bible has *very* little to say about female sexuality at all. Most of the sexual rules in the Bible are geared towards men, with the exception of bestiality and adultery (the later of which could still be argued to be geared towards men). The only condemnation of masturabtion is based on the wasting of men's semen. I don't believe we should think of things that way today, but even if you want to take the Bible literally, there is nothing wrong with a woman masturbating. You have nothing that's going to waste by the act.
There are so many more meaningful things that you can devote your energy to expressing your faith than condemning yourself for engaging in a harmless, natural act. Please think of focusing on loving your god instead of crippling yourself with guilt, or spending time trying to stop poverty and hunger instead of trying and failing to stop an urge that, as a human, you will never really be able to overcome, nor should you have to.
A perfect example of how religion stunts the normal sexual development of adults
Here is a 21 year old women who's tormented because she wants to touch her own body. HER OWN BODY!
I respect your very adult decision to not have sex until marriage, it is a wise choice. I do not understand how masturbation interferes with that decision?
Since you didn't ask my opinion as a Pantheist on how to stop, I won't offer one. But I would be interested in the response of Christians that view masturbation as sinful.
Frankly masturbation is a healthy outlet for sexuality that doesn't promote promiscuity or adultery. It won't result in pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases. Sometimes common sense should be used in place of religious dogma. Would it be alright if the Pope said you could do it?
look deeply into your soul and your reason, and find one very good reason why it is actually bad to masturbate.
if you find one (i'm sorry) but if you do, think about that reason every time you want to do this.
if you don't find one (hooray!) then keep at it and use what ';god gave you.';
Go to confession when you've fallen, but go regularly. Ask Jesus' mother to pray for you. Fast specifically for the grace and love of God. If you fall deeper in love with God, you will have the strength to resist the flesh.
Woody Allen said the definitive remark about masturbation which is that ';The nice thing about masturbation is that it means that you are always having sex with somebody who loves you '; Sadly in your case I don't think that any of us believe that to be true. Although I am an atheist I do realize that religion can and does often have a positive value in the lives of individuals.In your case I don't think that is true .I think think that your religious beliefs are doing damage to you. My suggestion to you is to seek out a competent mental health professional to deal with your depression and it's causes You may even want to ask your priest for a referral to a therapist that can help you within the parameters of Catholicism
Hang in there
...you are experiencing the high cost of Pascal's purportedly 'free' wager. Have you ever asked yourself why you believe what you believe? Maybe you're wrong and there's nothing wrong with it. Do you blindly believe all men who wear dresses, or just the ones who stand at the pulpit?
1. stop believing in the imaginary sky man
2. get laid.
This is called an addiction. I hope I have quit masturbating. I have not masturbated for 4 months now. It was very difficult for me to do as well. You are correct to feel guilty about masturbating because it is a sin to give in to your lustful temptations. Probably the hardest thing about this for me was that most everyone around me believes that this action is not sinful. What helped me was to dedicate my computer to Mary. My computer was the source of pornography for me. When i finally got all the porn out of it and replaced it all with holy articles and pictures, it was a big part of the battle. I would have been very sorry to get rid of my computer completely. I also went to confession every time I did it. This helped to mold my behavior. You must continue to pray as well. Ive met some priests who told me that this was not a mortal sin. Be careful of any priests who teach against the Catholic Church. They are confused. Continue to confess this every time. This is a very important thing to do. Also, I set up sessions with the priest outside of the confessional to seek his counseling. Perhaps the priest can help you by counseling you or recommending someone who would be appropriate to do so.
In short, continue to pray. Go to confession every time you commit this sin, and don't forget to do a careful examination of your conscience. Remove yourself from anything that leads you to this sin (porn, other people who encourage it, situations that encourage your depression or lust). Find a good counselor who believes as we do.
I know that this is very difficult to do. Quitting smoking was easier for me to do than this. I will tell you that although I sometimes suffer from this temptation, quitting doing it has changed my life for the better. I feel great. It is like a great weight has been lifted from my shoulders. After i type this i will say a prayer for you and i hope you will pray for me as well because this temptation continues to bother me.
Well I have had the same problem. I feel guilty, I don't want to do it again and I continue to fall back into the same trap over and over again. I like you had a ';free'; spell for about a year or more. One of the things that I have to do to start my road to recovery is realize what triggers me and tempts me to masturbate, most of the time it is choices I make with entertainment, or allowing lustful thoughts to linger in my mind. Occasionally the drive will come out of nowhere and sometime I don't even really want to do it at all and I catch myself doing it- those are the hardest times. Basically though I think that pinpointing things that cause you to fall and start to limit your exposure to such things should help as well as developing an acountability partner. A HUGE burden was lifted off my shoulders when I actually told a friend and confessed it to someone that actually cared about me. She has sense checked up to see how I am doing many times. Also realize that guilt does not come from God, He will convict us and draw us back to Him but will never condemn us. Jesus will always be there to forgive us no matter how many times or what it was that we have done- His love and forgiveness never end, as long as we are actually making an effort to change our ways.
cut it off.
* There's nothing wrong with it.
* But then again, there's nothing wrong with sex either.
* You're not hurting anybody. If I were your future husband, why would I want you to suffer before I met you? That would make me a sadist.
* Go ahead, knock yourself out.
* Your religion makes you detail it to another person? I hope it's another woman, at least.
go read http://girlwithaonetrackmind.blogspot.co鈥?/a> from start to finish.
Babe, Jilling off is the most natural thing in the world. Enjoy.
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